Quotes are some of my favorite things in the world to read and reminisce over. I used to be really good at recording and keeping track of them in my phone or on my twitter, But I’ve really been slacking lately. I still got some good ones though, but not many. So this post is going to feature quotes AND favorite tweets that have been in my life over the past year. Enjoy!
“If I’m going to be in the hospital, then I’m going to watch as much trashy reality tv as possible.” – what I said the day before Abram was born
“Anyone who starts talking about ‘the next one’ referring to a baby is going to get punched in the mouth.” – what I said the day after Abram was born
“Well, I’m gonna chalk this up to being awake.” – Daniel 4 days after Abram was born
RT @jonacuff: you know, Jewel used to live in a van. #thingspeoplesaidconstantlyinthe90s
“They might take a dump in the backyard like a golden retriever, but they are not the same thing.” – Matt Chandler on children
RT @benpatat: I’m eating the most worst foods for me. I love to eat bad foods for me.
“Sounds racist.” – My mothers response to me telling her about the high quality recordings of natural white noise that soothes Abram
“You’ve offended me so much today.” – Daniels response to my disdain for sloppy joes and Ice Age
“There are some setbacks to being poor… mainly it’s being poor.” – Daniel
“Babe, you know how I feel about pooping in a place predominantly occupied by women.” – Daniel
“Man, they’ve been beefin’ for a good minute.” – Robert Bartley on the Arabs and Jews
“Ma mama told me to eat ma garbage.” – passerby in downtown Miami
“Oh, so you want me to buy ya’ll some panties?” – another passerby in downtown Miami
“It’s real Snead-y in there.” – Massey on the Snead brothers
“Come over right now and harmonize with me and Eb.” – me to Brett Houston
“Take that free radicals!” – Daniel while eating blueberries
“I just made a 14 pump vanilla latte with 20 raw sugars.” – Julianna Hendrix
RT @sketchism: I wonder if lightning bugs ever see fireworks and think, “man, that dude is awesome.”
Daniel: I thought some of the graphics were lame. Me: well, it was 2005. Daniel: … I’m only ever going to say Jurassic Park. Me: … oh yea.
“I think something just hit me in the bowels.” – Daniel
“I just sliced the most gorgeous turkey for that lady’s sandwich.” – Brie Demott
“I’m gonna need some geometrical proof.” – Daniel referring to someone who might actually need an evangicube to accept Christ
“Sand people are the worst.” – Luke Skywalker
“Sometimes I just gotta caulk somethin.” – Heather Mullins
RT @jimmyrayhancock: You know. Just updating my myspace.
“Our son went from cooing to babbling at 5 am this morning. What a strange time for a developmental milestone.” – Daniel
“Someone dropped a grape on me.” – Jonny Peace
RT @jonacuff: I’m not gonna lie, when I was at focus on the family today, it was really hard for not to sneak off for an adventure in Odyssey.
“Sometimes moms have to take showers.” – me reasoning with Abram
RT @jimgaffigan: being a parent may be thankless but at least the pay is terrible.
“Jeff Foxworthy loves a jean.” – me at Cat2011
RT @michaelishustle: RT @prodigalsam: I’d trust a 300 ft T-Rex with nunchucks before trusting someone who buys cheap toilet paper.
“Dood, I need to split the regions at the transients.” – Daniel speaking a foreign language to John Petty
“She can do a real good Gretchen Wilson.” – man at farmers market
RT @juliannahendrix: “you know that spot in Greer where the road whips around like Talladega?” -@JacobSlawter
RT @benpatat: I had a dream we were all swimming in a creek, and a python came out of nowhere. Then @randalraineycaught it. We cheered.
“This one is such a low flyer.” – Daniel trying to kill a fly
“Thick neckington.” – Matt Fidler’s nickname for Daniel
RT @benpatat: Me: “Kyndal, if I turned into a zombie, would you shoot me?” @kyndalpatat: “Yes. Absolutely.” Me: “That’s my girl.”
“Treat Yo’self 2011!!” – Donna and Tom
RT @michaelishustle: RT @emilykdalton: When you can punch two people, one with each hand, at the same time.. You’re successful.
RT @lukashodge: wrestling fans LOVE flames.
“If you don’t run, then you’ll be gross…” – song I made up for motivation
“The only wattage I know of is the 1.21 of the jigga kind.” – Jessica Ferreira
” I just towel whipped a fly 4 times and it’s still alive. I think I’m gonna go listen to some death metal and then try again.” – me
RT @michaelishustleRT @ChristUnderoath:I wonder if Jesus thought farts were funny…
RT @jcarbo: “@anitracarbo: #in2012My New Years resolution is the same as last year. To not get pregnant again.”/hope my vasectomy holds …
@AndrewWK: PARTY TIP: the only thing we should hate is hate.
“Oh my gosh, is that his real face?” – Kaylee Beekman on Ron Perlman
RT @michaelishustle: RT @darlydalton: Cracker Barrel in Greer on 290 is out of meatloaf again, unbelievable!
” I really want to watch this, but I’m just gonna have to get used to his face.” – me on the Sons of Anarchy and Ron Perlman
RT @genieism: wait, Miami JaiAlai is still a thing?
RT @michaelishustle: RT @badbanana: Nothing says “I’m carrying $3 and a Guitar Center receipt” like a wallet chain.
“Big news! I almost got on the treadmill today.” – the pioneer woman
“This is about to be the most bitchingly fast bike in all of orange county.” – Buster
“Don’t ever flange.” – Adam Crocker
“I pledge allegiance to the Lamb, obviously.” – Daniel when I asked him what songs we should do for Easter this year
RT @jonacuff: We argue about a lot of things online, but can we please all agree that Teen Wolf 1 was the best of all the Teen Wolf films?
“Lukas…LUKAS. do not use karate on anyone.” – Melissa Gollery
me: how many times has 50 cent been shot, like 30? daniel: nah, only like 9 times. me: oh,ok
RT @FillWerrel: Sometimes when it rains i go outside with a cocktail umbrella and pretend im a Giant.